A human’s chalkboard assignments

This list of chalkboard assignments may be used for your human when he does not behave well. The below variations and choices will help you pick an assignment for him/her.
1. I will not bathe my master after he bathes himself in the mud puddle.
2. I will not drag my master from the interesting sniffing [...]

Question and answer animal jokes

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road??
A: To show the armadillo that it was possible.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road??
A: To get away from Colonel Sanders!
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? twice?
A: Because it was a double-crosser.
Q: Why did the Iraqi chicken cross the road?
A: To take over the [...]